Chapter Thirty-Six:
A Little Rain Must Fall

Lucky's room.

Emily lies against Lucky's chest, her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. Lucky, his exhaustion having caught up with him, is still sleeping soundly. She is fighting hard to let herself be lulled by the combined rhythm of his breathing and the rain pelting the window. She can feel the panic still stirring occasionally in her stomach, if she lets herself consider what would happen to her life if this heart ever stopped beating. She stubbornly refuses to admit to herself that she's awake, attempting to drift back into a less conscious state. The fact is, she's slowly been becoming aware of her surroundings for a few hours now, but she doesn't want to move. She feels warm and surprisingly safe here. She's so relaxed that she doesn't even start when Lucky's hand reaches up and gently strokes her hair. She look up at him and smiles.

Lucky: (quietly) I'm sorry. I didn't want to wake you up.

Em: You didn't. (Lucky closes his eyes, still feeling incredibly heavy. Emily frowns) How are you feeling?

Lucky: I'm not sure yet.

Em: Emotional hangover.

Lucky: Is that what it is?

Em: Looks like. Not the good kind, either.

Lucky: I don't want to think about it right now. (She lies back against him, again, accepting this. She's feeling completely willing to lie here with him all day, if necessary. Lucky glances over at the clock.) Uh, Em?

Em: Mmmm?

Lucky: It's ten o'clock.

Em: I know.

Lucky: What about school?

Em: It's started, I assume.

Lucky: Yeah. And you're not there.

Em: So what are they going to do? (she giggles to herself) Can you see Jason coming in for a parent/teacher conference?

Lucky: That wasn't really my point.

Em: You asked me to stay. I stayed. (Lucky's incredibly touched that she'd actually miss school to be there when he woke up. At the same time, he figures he must have come off as pretty needy).

Lucky: (embarrassed) Oh. (Emily smiles to herself, unseen. Lucky can be frighteningly predictable sometimes. He clears his throat) Does this mean,.. You've been thinking?

Em: (groaning) A little.

Lucky: Am I still on probation? (Emily doesn't say anything a moment. She has been so overwhelmed by his behavior last night, and by the feelings she's been having since then, that she managed to push everything else away for this moment. She's not sure she wants it all to come back.)

Em: (slowly) I'm still feeling confused, Ok? I'm still terrified, something is going to happen to you, and I'm frustrated that you're not even CLOSE to being as worried as I am. (Emily feels her face flush, and sits up, upset that she's gotten this distraught this quickly) I don't know how you do this to me. One minute I want to strangle you, and the next all I know is that I'm so crazy in love with you I can't see straight. (She sighs heavily, as Lucky struggles to figure out how to take that comment). Lucky, if something happens to you.... (she stops, having already beaten that horse to death. She looks at him, and claps her hands together) Ok! I've got it. Let's say I get hit by a truck -- (Lucky sits up)

Lucky: (firmly) Don't.

Em: Just think about it.

Lucky: No! (Emily looks at him seriously)

Em: You see what I mean? The only difference is, I'm not playing in traffic.

Lucky: (heavily) I meant what I said Emily. I have to do a favor for Jason. After that, I'm done.

Em: I know you mean it. But you meant it last time, too. (she looks over at him) I swear, Lucky, if you get a paper cut, I can't promise to be rational about it.

Lucky: Jason would never let me do anything dangerous. For starters, my father would kill him.

Em: (darkly) He'd have to get in line.

Lucky: Emily. (He turns her head to look at him) Listen to me. I love you. You're the most incredible thing in my life, and I want a life away from here, with you. I'm not risking that for anything. I will be fine.

Em: You can't say that. You can't just tell me you don't want to die, and expect it to solve everything. My mother didn't WANT to leave me, but she didn't have a choice. (Lucky reaches out and pulls her into his arms, both of them falling back onto the bed. She curls up against him).

Lucky: (softly) I'm sorry, Em. I didn't think it was a big deal. I just had to -- (He stops short of bringing up Hannah) It's going to be over soon. (Emily closes her eyes, and forces herself, out of sheer will, to relax against him. He looks down at her, feeling an intense wave of guilt. He slowly traces her hairline with in index finger. He swallows hard) It's been a long time since you've talked about your mother.

Em: (monotone) it makes people uncomfortable.

Lucky: Emily. (He lifts her face up to look at him. She sighs and opens her eyes) You can tell me anything.

Em: I know. (She shakes her head) It's just hard to talk about .... It's been six and a half years.

Lucky: You still miss her.

Em: I'll always miss her. (She sits up again, and takes in a deep breath of air). I just... every time something happens, things like school, and .... (she looks at him) I wonder what she would have thought of you. Of us. All of that. I don't even know what she'd think of me.

Lucky: Yes, you do.

Em: (looking down at the bedspread) I didn't really know who she was. I mean, she was my Mom. But I was eleven years old. There was a lot of stuff I didn't know about her. (She looks up at him) I mean, what did you think of your mother when you were eleven compared to now? (Lucky's face immediately clouds. Emily winces) I'm sorry, that was dumb.

Lucky: No... you just (He sighs heavily) Last night... I was thinking about Switzerland. (Emily looks up at him, concerned. Lucky regards her expression -- not demanding, or judgmental. Just waiting for him to tell her what's going on. He smiles slightly) Em, if it was you --

Em: It wasn't.

Lucky: Humor me, Ok? Would you have done it?

Em: (exhaling heavily) depends. Back then? If it meant your Mom could come home, and your family could be together again? If you hadn't then... well, who knows? It wouldn't have been pretty.

Lucky: No.

Em: But now. I mean, I had a front row seat to see what keeping that secret's done to you. So now, I wouldn't. Ever. (Lucky nods slowly) Are you thinking of telling?

Lucky: I don't know. (Emily searches his face with her eyes. She nods slowly)

Em: Speaking of secrets... (Lucky looks away from her, a little too quickly. She smiles slightly) I figured out what you were up to.

Lucky: What?

Em: The other day. (Lucky stares at her, uncomprehendingly). You saw Carly, didn't you? (Lucky takes a moment to process the question)

Lucky: Right. Yeah, last week. (he frowns) How did you find out about that?

Em: AJ came by the penthouse with a letter. She even sent him a photo. What did you say to her?

Lucky: (quietly) I don't even remember. Probably that she owed me one. (He sighs) I think it's what she wants, though. Things went a bit too far, even for Carly. All she really wants is someone who'll love her unconditionally. She just seems to have a strange way of going about it.

Em: (ruefully) You could totally be talking about AJ. That should have worked out.

Lucky: Or been a complete disaster.

Em: (heavily) When the Quartermaines are involved, I guess there's not much question about which side of the coin things will end up on.

Lucky: How are you and the Q's? (Emily groans, and flops back on the bed, resting her head on his chest again.)

Em: I think I have to go home.

Lucky: You don't have to go anywhere.

Em: No.... But it makes sense to go now. I mean, AJ's trying, and Monica's trying... and Alan will probably get around to trying too. (She sighs) I so don't want to talk about this. (She stops and listens to the rain, while Lucky lightly rubs the back of her neck. They lie in silence for a moment.) Well, I guess I don't have a choice. I mean, they are my family. Twisted as they are.

Lucky: Is that a term of endearment?

Em: I do love them. I don't know why half the time, but I love them. They're all I've got. Except for you. (Lucky looks heavenward, thinking that he gets the message).

Lucky: Em... do you know anything about the day you were born?

Em: (laughing) The day I was born? Ok. Ah... I think -- it was raining! I know that. I was raining and they had trouble driving to the hospital. And then the labor was really long, and she was really tired... and I was born, and my Dad gave me my first bath (she sighs heavily) That's all I know. At least, that's all that I can remember her telling me. (She forces a lump forming in her throat down. Lucky strokes her hair softly)

Lucky: Did she sing anything to you? (Emily looks up at him oddly)

Em: That's a weird question.

Lucky: It's just a question.

Em: I don't know. (She frowns) That's what I meant, I guess. There's just a lot of stuff I'll never know.

Lucky: Well, you were born. That's the important part. (Emily nods, closing her eyes again and holds him a little tighter.)

Outside Nikolas's Apartment.

Hannah sits, in jeans and a flannel shirt, in front of Nikolas's door. Every sound, she looks up, expecting to see Nikolas appear. She's not sure what she's going to say to him. Another last ditch attempt to convince him to stay away from her, she guesses, having no faith whatsoever that it will take. She should really just give this up -- especially if Lucky's just going to get her killed anyway. For some reason, she's having a hard time taking her situation seriously. It's too extreme. The door to the elevator opens and Hannah struggles to her feet, stumbling violently. She grabs the wall and looks up to see Nikolas looking at her with amusement and confusion. She nods)

Hannah: Hey.

Nik: Good morning.

Hannah: I took a chance you were going to be back here before Lunch.

Nik: How did you get up here? (Nikolas walks over to the door, keys in hand)

Hannah: Doorman let me up

Nik: (mumbling) That's a bit lax of security.

Hannah: (indicating her clothes) I think he thought I was the maid. (Nikolas unlocks the door and opens it, making a sweeping gesture indicating Hannah enter first. She frowns at him, then enters. She stops in the doorway and gasps. The place looks like something out of a magazine, with oriental rugs, and ornate -- though not gothic -- furniture. It's slightly more comfortable looking than Wyndemere. It has high ceilings and hardwood floors, a staircase leading up to a second floor. Hannah feels immediately out of her league). Home Sweet Home, huh?

Nik: Well, home.

Hannah: Sweet isn't an adjective you appreciate?

Nik: They aren't two words I would put together.

Hannah: (under her breath) Me either. (she turns to face him) Well, it's not humble.

Nik: What's that? (He closes the door, and walks towards her)

Hannah: (wryly) Ask me again. I could give you a whole presentation. Right now I have a more pressing question for you. (She shakes her head, smiling ruefully) Why didn't you tell me you were twenty?

Nik: (taking another step, clearly invading personal space) You didn't ask.

Hannah: (backing up) It never occurred to me.

Nik: (shrugging) Then it can't be very important.

Hannah: Nikolas! Do you have any idea how old I am?

Nik: I don't care.

Hannah: I'm twenty-eight.

Nik: Your point?

Hannah: When I was graduating high school, you were ten!

Nik: Well, admittedly, you may have been out of my league back then. (Hannah shoots him a look)

Hannah: This is... Twenty? How is that POSSIBLE! What kind of twenty-year-old are you? I.. I just don't understand this.

Nik: If you didn't guess my age, then how can you possibly dismiss me now because of it?

Hannah: You WERE trying to hid this from me, weren't you?

Nik: It never came up! You never asked me my age, not once. You were too busy telling me to go away. And no, people tend to hold my age against me.

Hannah: It IS a consideration.

Nik: I'm of age.

Hannah: You can't even drink! (Nikolas leans forward, and brushes his lips lightly against hers)

Nik: We don't drink together, Hannah. (Hannah pulls away. Nikolas, rather unimpressed, folds his arms across his chest, and regards her continued railing)

Hannah: (flustered) No, but it was nice to have the option, you know?

Nik: This doesn't matter to me. And I can't figure out why it matters to you. My age doesn't mean anything to me. It's just a number.

Hannah: See, that's something you say when you're forty!

Nik: You're stepping on my point.

Hannah: Which is?

Nik: If age isn't important to me, then why is it important to you? We're already in a clandestine relationship, correct? (Hannah collapses on his couch, sliding down against the pillows.)

Hannah: I told you I didn't know anything about you.

Nik: I offered. You didn't even have a question for me. (Hannah leans her head back and looks up at the distant ceiling.) And I assume you don't want me to ask any questions.

Hannah: It doesn't matter. (she smirks bitterly) I don't even know where I stand right now.

Nik: Is this about Lucky? (Hannah sits up)

Hannah: No. Of course not.

Nik: I know you didn't want Luke Spencer to know about us.

Hannah: Lucky's not talking.

Nik: Are you sure?

Hannah: He'd tell me. That's the only thing I'm sure of with him. (Carefully) I'm beginning to realize that the Spencer's morals are a little... askew.

Nik: (bitterly) A little? Luke Spencer, to the best of my knowledge, has no morals. None that I've seen, at least. Lucky... well, he thinks like his father.

Hannah: (covering nerves) Define no morals...

Nik: They lie.

Hannah: All of them, or just Luke and Lucky?

Nik: All of them. But then, that's true of most people, so I can't really fault them. (Hannah frowns, thinking Lucky had been brutally honest with her so far. Unless that was all an act)

Hannah: Do you think they're dangerous?

Nik: Is Lucky threatening you?

Hannah: (you must be joking) No! Why would he do that?

Nik: Because you're involved with me. Presuming we lay this age issue to rest. (Hannah groans. She looks over at him, still stubbornly planted behind the sofa, arms across his chest)

Hannah: Don't you feel like there are a million reasons for us not to be together?

Nik: No. (Hannah screams in frustration)

Hannah: Why is everything so black and white with you? You just make up your mind and that's IT.

Nik: For starters, it's been an effective strategy with you.

Hannah: (sarcastically) What, is that what this is? A game of sexual chess? (Nikolas frowns)

Nik: That's reductive.

Hannah: It was MEANT to be.

Nik: (taking a step closer to her) Why? I've agreed to keep this secret, we've established that my age is really secondary

Hannah: YOU'VE established that.

Nik: I'm doing what you want me to. All so that you'll occasionally let me see a glimpse into that shell you wear. (Hannah leans back against the couch again) Do you think I'm doing this for sex? As you've pointed out, I could be dating twenty year olds. (Hannah picks up a pillow, spinning around on the couch, and viciously pelts it at him. He ducks, and it bounces off the bannister on the stair case. Hannah stares at him a moment, then finds herself laughing again.)

Hannah: You're driving me CRAZY.

Nik: Short trip. (Hannah picks up another pillow, and throws it at him without the same force. This time it hits his shoulder. He continues to stand there, arms crossed, like an immovable statue.)

Hannah: React, damn it!

Nik: (coolly) Make me. (Hannah glares at him. She climbs up over the back of the couch, and pulls him towards her. Balancing precariously on the back of the sofa, she proceeds to kiss him deeply, exploring his mouth with her tongue, passionately pressing against him. Nikolas sways slightly, nearly causing her to tumble forward, onto the floor. She shrieks, and pull back, letting herself slide down the back of the couch. Nikolas puts a hand over his mouth momentarily.)

Hannah: Check. I got a reaction. (Nikolas drops his hand, revealing a self-satisfied smirk)

Nik: Checkmate. I was trying to get you to kiss me.

Hannah: I give up. (She lies back on the couch, dramatically. Nikolas, much to her surprise, rolls agilely over the back of the couch, landing on top of her. She smiles up at him seductively and gives him another deep kiss. Nikolas, essentially in heaven at this point, pulls her towards him, running his hands though her hair, then running them down her neck. Hannah pulls back slightly.) Nikolas....

Nik: Mmmmm?

Hannah: Whatever this costs me... you're worth it.